Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
