im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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