Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
