I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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