i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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