I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
