Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Terrible idea I love it
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
