i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
