I have demons in me.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
