I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
