My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
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