in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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