but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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