I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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