So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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