u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
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