You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
