you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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