i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
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