I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
