we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
His nipple licking is glorious
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