I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Sext me about skeletons
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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