Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
