Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
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