Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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