my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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