we made out on top of his cat.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
