Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
