What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
i now understand why vodka
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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