I understand Curling. That high.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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