Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Call meee

(781): View more from Massachusetts

Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...

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(714): View more from California

DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"

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(517): View more from Michigan

My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.

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(917): View more from New York City

was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?

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(862): View more from New Jersey

That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs

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(641): View more from Iowa

I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.

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