that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
