That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize
