Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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