May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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