I'm really into asian looking animals
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Randomize
