hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
