I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
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