you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
