STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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