I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Is it because I queefed?
she told me i tasted like america
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
