Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
