Whod you bang
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
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