Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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