This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize