I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Randomize
