You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
