This girl is more easily done than said...
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Sorry my hands just texted you
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Randomize
