I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize