i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Less talking, more tequila
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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